Holding Tight to the Dream by Roseanna White

It's with great pleasure that I present to you, Roseanna White, an incredible writer, an amazing critic, and a great friend! I know you all will be inspired to "hold tight to the dream" just as I have been! Thank-You Roseanna, for doing this for me! You're the best! Oh and by the way, check out her blog at www.roseannamwhite.blogspot.com! It's worth your time! :)

Holding Tight to the Dream



When I was, oh, six years old or so, I learned about a peculiar magic called writing. Not just putting pencil to paper, though that was the gate–but using that skill to put down those stories running rampant through my mind. From the very first time my teacher assigned the task of writing a story for class, I knew that this magic was something special, something that came from deep inside me.

When I was twelve, I started carrying around a 3-ring binder loaded with notebook paper, which had My Book in it. After I finished my assignments for class, I’d break that baby out and write. My classmates got used to it and would gladly offer names when I needed new characters. =) I finished that book when I was thirteen.

For me, writing was at once a shimmering dream floating ever on the horizon and air that I just couldn’t live without. I have to write. I can’t go through a day without a story in my head. I can’t walk down the street without translating the visual images into words.

But writing and making a living from writing are two very different things. Isn’t that the way with dreams? Enjoying them is easy. But grasping them, holding onto them, making them turn into something solid after your eyelids flutter open in the morning . . . that’s tough.

Through college, I didn’t worry so much about it. Writing was sanity. I wrote to unwind from my ridiculously tough workload, getting up early, jotting down notes on stories during class, bringing my laptop along when I knew I’d have a spare half hour. I wrote what I loved, I wrote because I loved it. And because I never tried to bridge the gap between my world of writing and the world of writing, I thought I could do anything with my words. It gave me a confidence that couldn’t be shaken–

Until I tried to get published. Talk about a bucket of cold water being dumped over my head! I had toyed with publishing before, but after college I got serious about it and joined a writers association. Soon I realized that I was doing so . . . much . . . wrong.

It shook me–it really did. And you can tell as much if you read the last book I wrote before I learned all the “rules” and then the first one after. Before, I wrote with passion and confidence. After, I wrote with a wavering spirit and an invisible but perceptible “Is this right??” I still wrote, don’t get me wrong. But it took me a few manuscripts, and a few rewrites, to get to the point where I could use my new knowledge to strengthen my dream instead of just dashing it to pieces.

I’m 27 now. Had you asked me back in high school, I would have told you that by 27 I’d have a whole shelf full of books with my name on the spine. In reality, I have one, and it’s “only” a small press book, which means it’s not available everywhere. But you know what? It’s made the dream burn stronger. I haven’t sold a ton of copies of A Stray Drop of Blood yet, but it’s starting to click. The rave reviews out there are gaining attention, and I’ve had people comment on the great things they’ve heard about it when I have no idea where they’ve heard these things.

When I come across an aspiring author (like you, Holly!), I feel this need bubble up inside to help, to point them in the directions I had to grope for blindly, to make sure they know right away the things that it took me years to discover. That way when the waves of self-doubt strike (as they surely will), I’m there to assure them that the tide will go out, and they’ll be left with perfect, moldable sand with which to build their castle of dreams.

I think the most important thing you can do when you see a dream shimmering on your horizon is to ask for God to be your clarification. Is this His vision for you? If so, He’ll sharpen your focus, He’ll be your telescope, your microscope, your magnifying glass–depending on how close it is. If it’s not, then He can redirect your gaze to another dream, one designed perfectly for you.

Is achieving it easy, even when it’s His will? Absolutely NOT. But when you trust in it and keep your focus true, then each step, each pothole, each bump will bring you new lessons that you needed, new challenges to craft you into the creature you need to be for its fulfillment.

I’m still waiting for my “big break,” for “success.” And that’s okay–I can wait forever, if I have to. Because I’m secure in my dream, and I know I’m doing what the Lord wants me to do. I have seen lives touched by my words, and it humbles me. Brings tears to my usually-dry eyes. Who am I, that He would use me?

Who are you, that He wouldn’t? We are His children, and we are charged with reaching others for Him. And what an awesome God, that He equips us with dreams with which to carry that out! If you have a dream, something that just won’t let you go, ask Him how He wants to use it, how it can glorify Him. And then follow on whatever crazy, backwards, confusing path He takes you on. You might not come out where you think you should, but you’ll be right where He wants you to be.